STATE OF THE UNION ANALYSIS

Barack Obama's Speech:

He said Facebook and Google are like Edison and the Wright brothers.

This is fucking stupid.

According to Wikipedia Facebook has 1700 employees.

Which is nothing.

Darden Restaurants(Owners of Olive Garden and Red Lobster) has 180,000 employees which probably doesn't include all the people running the fish farms and truck drivers, napkin factories, silverware companies, plumbers that repair things, dishwasher companies, broom companies, condiment companies, etc that employ thousands more.

It would seriously be better to create another restaurant chain than open up another Facebook.

Google has 24,000 employees though, I guess we can give Google some credit.

Then he said we would make America into Japan, a big techno wifi gadget internet obsessed culture.

I don't want to be Japan.

I don't think other Americans want to be Japan. (This is not against the Japanese, they are great at being Japenese)

Maybe they do.

We are probably turning our children into gadget obsessed tards who don't know how to light a fire or grow a tomato.

Obama said we don't have any money.

This seems factual.

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The Republican responded and said we don't have any money and that we need to repeal Obamacare.

Only 18% of America wants to repeal Obamacare.

Which means the Republicans are only representing health care companies.

The CBO said Obamacare will reduce the deficit, here is what it says, "On March 20, 2010, CBO released its final cost estimate for the reconciliation act, which encompassed the effects of both pieces of legislation. Table 1 (on page 5) provides a broad summary and Table 2 offers a detailed breakdown of the budgetary effects of the two pieces of legislation. CBO and the staff of the Joint Committee on Taxation (JCT) estimate that enacting both pieces of legislation will produce a net reduction in federal deficits of $143 billion over the 2010-2019 period. About $124 billion of that savings stems from provisions dealing with health care and federal revenues; the other $19 billion results from the education provisions. Those figures do not include potential costs that would be funded through future appropriations (those are discussed on pages 10-11 of the cost estimate)."

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Michele Bachmann for the Tea Party said that America has no money. The Tea Party has no plan but to not spend money.

Then she said we need to like wage war on our debt.

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Conclusion

America has no money.

They are lagging behind in innovation

Our politicians still believe in Manifest Destiny

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Noah Cicero's Response

America, we need to start gardening. Everyone needs a garden and to grow some kind of fruit tree suited to your climate.

The government will provide you with hoes, trowels, and seeds.

No more stupid suburbs will be built. Everyone is going to learn to walk like the Indians.

No more large gas guzzling piles of shit will be sold in America. We can do that because we own stock in the car companies.

We will reduce medical costs by purchasing the copyrights to medical equipment and medication which we are allowed to in the Takings Clause.

We will follow the rules of Machiavelli and colonize Iraq and Afghanistan to insure we rule there peacefully.

We will send our unemployed and our rich kid drug addicts there to colonize.

We are going to pass an Amendment concerning campaign finance so democracy is restored.

We are going to be able to vote for three days one of those days your employee must completely close so people can vote.

Information about the candidates will be free to read at the high school gym where you vote.

Small windmills will be given to citizens to get electricity from.

This is the plan.

Get to it.