I was sitting at the computer the other day
it was night
I was drinking water from a bottle
I said to someone, "I missed my chance to kill myself. I should have killed myself right after my brother did, I wasn't talking to my family anymore, you and your family would have only known me for a year. We didn't have that many memories together. You would have got over it easily. I didn't teach your nephews how to fish and shoot pellet guns. I never fixed any house related things with your father. I could have legitmately killed myself, people would have said, 'Oh, Noah, his family wasn't good and he couldn't stand facing life without his brother and family.' It would have been simple. Of course people would have talked shit, they always do.
But I missed my chance.
Now I have to wait for my next chance."
14 comments:
i'll keep that in mind the next time i have a good opportunity. wisdom....
this should be in a book. in a fine fine book
I think about it a lot, too. If it weren't for two people in my life who I think it would actually negatively affect, it would probably already be done.
That "it's never worth it, there's always something to live for" is such crap.
As the Anonymous person said above, if the thing holding you back is concern about the negative effect on other people, then perhaps ironically that would be the thing you are living for.
Suicide (Latin suicidium, from sui caedere, to kill oneself) is the intentional killing of one's self. The most common cause is an underlying mental disorder which include depression, bipolar disorder, schizophrenia, alcoholism and drug abuse. Financial difficulties or other undesirable situations play a significant role.
"As the Anonymous person said above, if the thing holding you back is concern about the negative effect on other people, then perhaps ironically that would be the thing you are living for."
Agree
keep passing open windows. earth needs you.
if there are those that would suffer from me ending my suffering then let me suffer.
Tough.
I sometimes think too, why haven't I done it already.
used to think i should have done it when was 17. now i feel like i've outstayed my welcome or something.
Please don't kill yourself.
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Sui caedere! oh la la la it sounds so elegant! thanks in the other hand be brave ... go, hire some sluts and enjoy the life fella.
Thank you for your post, pretty helpful material.
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