Tuesday, March 24, 2009

What Ellen Kennedy does to me

Ellen Kennedy's new book can be purchased here.

Writing does a lot of things, one of them is make us think about our own things. This is what Ellen Kennedy reminds me of in my life.

From her Bear Parade Book called Yesterday I was Talking to myself.

She writes, "and watched ducks swim away from me."

Ducks are really intense to me. There is this large pond with a water fall about a mile from house. You can see it when driving down Tibbits Wick Road. It is located on this land owned by the Catholic Church designated for nuns. Sometimes you see nuns walking around the lake feeding ducks bread. In the winter there were these ducks walking on the ice. One of the ducks was standing on the precipice of the waterfall staring over. It looked like the duck was going to kill itself. But then I realized ducks could fly.

Kennedy writes, "i don't like to talk. every time i go somewhere with a friend they always expect me to talk to them. i like to sit quietly. when i watch a movie or read a poem i don't like to discuss it with anyone. i like to watch movies and then maybe sleep. no talking. occasionally i watch the same movie over and over again until i fall asleep. i prefer watching movies alone. i prefer reading alone. i prefer eating alone. i prefer walking alone. i prefer listening to music alone. i prefer singing alone. i prefer swimming alone. i prefer to eat small children alone. i like it when sean reads me poetry but i just like to listen quietly and not comment afterwards. sometimes i feel this makes him uncomfortable."

This reminds me of how I'm alone right now, will walk around school alone, go home to read alone, listen to music alone, and fall asleep alone tonight.

From Kennedy, "'i want to rub my face in my blueberries'"

The other I was at work. And this server found an ant. She starting yelling, "There's and ant, there's an ant. This is a restaurant." I said, "Who cares, ants are edible." I got the urge to take the ant and eat it. But realized that would be a bit too intense for everyone and they already think I'm nuts and I better calm down with my impulses.

From Kennedy

i have no ambitions


i don't want to hate the president

i don't want to go to harvard

i don't want to win the pulitzer prize

i just want to sit in my bathtub

and think about relationships i will never have

with people i will never meet

and then go lay in my bed

with a magnifying glass

and count all the stiches in my sheets

until i fall asleep

and wake up

to repeat again.


Last night I saw Bablyon Anno Domini and Vin Diesel got blown up and was later revived and turned into a robot type creature.

From Kennedy, "“Do you want to go to the bathroom with me?”

I really like that line. It is really nice to go to the bathroom with somebody. You both are sitting in there watching the other one pee. Maybe even fart or shit. It is always really funny. And friendly too. It is really friendly to go to the bathroom with somebody. I never understood why in public we can't go to the bathroom with our lovers. Why must we separate to go to the bathroom. I don't like that.

Here is the rest of that poem

From Kennedy, a poem about working in a laundromat

Here's my favorite line, "I won't have any co-workers!"

Sometimes at work they let me do this thing called, "salads." Which consists of me standing alone not talking to anyone, no one talking to me, making salads. Sometimes I go in the back and put silverware in little plastic things to be washed and rolled. No one talks to me, I'm making money, the salads are fun to make, and life is really good.

Ellen Kennedy is Socratic in her thinking, she takes on theory of Socrates, " "The unexamined life is not worth living."

Kennedy examines her life, she sees it for what it is. She doesn't turn it into something it isn't. And because of that, she can write things that can anyone can relate, take and make their own.

Monday, March 23, 2009

Ellen Kennedy Week

This is Ellen Kennedy week

We will be celebrating Kennedy's first book Sometimes my Heart pushes my Ribs.

I like Ellen Kennedy.

I've met Ellen twice I think.

The first was when she was living in PA several years ago.

I went to visit her and Tao.

She lived in a small town that looked like something from a postcard.

All the buildings and houses were built like 200 years ago.

It reminded me of Benjamin Franklin, like the town screamed, "BENJAMIN FRANKLIN."

I was in Ellen's house.

I didn't go up to Ellen's room.

Her mom was there.

She told her mom I went to Columbia for English or something.

Her mom said I was nuts.

We went to a store like Wal-Mart, and Tao and her stole me batteries so I could listen to CDs on the way home.

I thought that was nice of them.

Then we went to Ming Moon or Main Moon or some place that serves cheap asian food.

We sat and talked.

It was really nice.

The second time I saw Ellen was in NYC.

She was sitting on the steps of KGB looking miserable.

She had a large black hat on.

She moved slowly.

Ellen has this really good attitude, like no matter what everything she says and does exudes, "I don't know, maybe you should go suck dick in hell."

I don't know what created that attitude.

It isn't really punk rock.

Punk rock is more in your face.

Ellen Kennedy is trying to get away from your face because it is pissing her off.

I've talked to Ellen Kennedy a lot on the webcam

We sit with our clothes not looking at each other talking about random shit that doesn't matter.

One night we played guitars together over the webcam. I think the song was Smells like Teen Spirit.

We laughed and felt better.

Saturday, March 21, 2009

The Interrogation and Trial of Edward M. Liddy

In 2009 Edward m. Liddy was brought in for questioning at the NYPD police station. He was put in a small room to be interrogated. He was an old white man. He looked exactly like every other CEO the news was showing lately. They were like their own race of old white men that were spawned from an old white man cloning machine. The people of America were shocked to see all these old white men being considered criminals. America had a black male president and old white male criminals. The scene had changed.

Edward M. Liddy sat with a coffee in a Styrofoam cup. He didn't sweat. His face was neutral and apathetic. He was completely convinced that the police would see the power he contained and let him go.

Detective Socrates entered the room. It wasn't the old Socrates of busts and paintings. But a young one. The Socrates that fought in wars for his Athens that would later kill him.

Socrates sat across from Liddy and said, “165 million is a pretty big bonus?”

Liddy replied, “I know, that's a lot of money.”

“That doesn't seem unjust to you?”

“It's my money.”

“If the American government bails you out, and owns 80% of your company. Isn't that tax payer money?”

“We made that money, it's ours. It was part of the contract. That everyone gets a bonus.”

“Now, let me understand this. You wrote up a contract giving yourself bonuses even though your company isn't making money?”

“Yes, isn't that genius?”

“Now, you're telling me. That all you have to do, to get money. Is to write up a contract and have each other sign it, then give it to each other?”

“Yeah, isn't that great?”

Socrates rubbed his eyes, squinted, and said, “You don't find anything unjust about that, or at least weird?”

“My job is to make money. I'm a CEO. My job is to get myself and the other board of directors money. If the other members of the board get money, then they assume I'm doing a good job. And they don't fire me. That is my job. That is the virtue of my job.”

“Your virtue is to make money?”

“Yes, that is my job description. To make money.”

“Now, my question is: do you make money or get money?”

“I make money. That's my job.”

“Now how do you make money? Are you a printing press?”

Liddy looks at Socrates with a serious expression and says, “Are you trying to be a jackass. Do you know who I am.? I am the CEO of AIG, I was once the CEO of Allstate, the CFO of Sears Roebuck, and I've been a member of the board for Boeing and Goldman Sachs. I'm power.”

“Well, I'm a police officer. I was put here to protect. I was also put here by the people. That is my job. The virtue of my job is that I protect people from other people. I do not know about you, I do not who you are, or why you would ever considering giving tax payer money to yourself and your fellow board of directors. I do not know these things. I am ignorant. I want to find them out. I'm asking these things to find out why.”

Liddy looked pissed and said, “Do you suppose that shepherds or cowherds consider the good of the sheep or the cows and fatten them and take care of them looking to something other than their masters' good? I have a right to take their money. I'm the strong. They are the weak.”

“But you have been caught. No one is celebrating your success now. The just is the advantage of the stronger, and the unjust is what is profitable and advantageous for oneself.”

“It is unjust to take money that I've made. That is my money.”

“You keep saying make and made. When did you make this money?”

“I'm the owner. I own the money. The contracts were legal and I signed them. Therefore I made that money.”

“Now, we live in a Lockean society do we not?”

“Yes, of course.”

“Locke says that ownership comes when a person mixes their labor with something. Or perhaps makes something. Like a construction workers mixes his labor with the roads and buildings, a teacher mixes their labor with the minds of his or her students, a cook mixes his labor with food. And through mixing their labor they make something new. And because they have made something new, they get money for it. They get money because they can't trade the road they made, or the mind they altered, or the cheeseburger for such things as car insurance or Pop Tarts? That's correct isn't it?”

“Yes, that's the theory.”

“Well, we live in a Lockean society. So when a person says, 'I make money doing construction. It implies that they are doing something, mixing their labor with something. What exactly are you mixing your labor with?”

Liddy looked confused and said, “I own. I don't mix. People below me mix.”

“But you can't own without mixing?”

“I got it legitimately.”

Socrates stood up and paced the room and said, “Well, lets see if you did. You say you got it legitimately through contracts drawn up by lawyers. But that isn't good enough. What we are discussing is philosophy, not little documents. What we have is a social contract problem. People agree to the social contract, they give up certain rights to escape the state of nature. After they have agreed they commence finding a function in their society. Now we aren't like the people of medieval Europe or India, we don't have a caste system where we follow the footsteps of our parents. We have a Lockean system, we can choose when we get to adulthood what we want to do, depending on what endowments we have. But even though we do not have to follow the footsteps of our parents. We still must honor the occupation we have chosen. The factory workers makes his plastic parts, the cook makes the steak, the accountant calculates the bills, the teacher, the policeman, the construction worker, the street sweeper, and even the garbage man all honor their occupation by doing the best job they can. They learn about their jobs, they gather knowledge about their jobs, they are trained and most attempt to do their job with sincerity and well. They honor their function in society. That rule we set down at the beginning as to what must be done in everything when we were founding the city or a certain form of it, is, in my opinion justice. Surely we set down and often said, that each one must practice one of the functions in the city, that one for which his nature made naturally most fit.”

“But that is not what I was taught. I have a defense.”

Socrates sat down again. Took a sip of coffee and lit a cigarette and said, “Well, what is it?”

“The guardians taught me to be ignorant. I was told by the guardians that what I was doing was correct. The guardians allowed me to steal money. They allowed me to give bonuses for years. They allowed me to take out loans and leverage them at 35 to one. They allowed me to short sell stocks. They allowed me to gamble with normal people's 401Ks. They allowed it. I have been told since I was little that to be successful. To be honorable meant to want money. It meant to be ambitious. This country is about money, it is about success, I excelled to the board of directors of major corporations. Corporations so huge they were small nations existing within states.”

“Is that why you are too big to fail?”

“Yes, our corporations became so huge. Employed so many people. That we are like our own governments now. All we are missing is military.”

“So you are saying you built cities?”

“Yes, we built cities. Cities of workers, cities of capital, cities of power.”

“But you had no social contract. You did not consider the rules of building of a city. You're cities existed for the sake of wealth, without regard for the souls of your employees, of your stock holders, consumers, even of yourselves. You built cities without music, without theater, without philosophy. You convinced them to work for you, only for money. You convinced those who purchased your goods, to purchase your goods not because they want them. Not because it would help them attain virtue, to create happier people. No, you only wanted them to buy what you owned to sell because it would make you a profit?”

“Yes, but that was allowed. They let us do it. It was legal,” said Liddy.

“But as a member of the board of directors and having so much power did you never think you were a guardian. That you had a responsibility to your employees, stock holders, and consumers?”

Liddy closes his eyes and says softly, “I like power.”

“Your ignorance has led to vice. Which has led to injustice. It doesn't matter if it was technically legal. There is a greater contract that exists in every society. And the people, or the general will has decided you have broken it. There is a greater court than even the Supreme in this land. It isn't used often, but for you it will be used,” Socrates said.

A police officer comes in and pulls Liddy from his chair and says, “Follow me.” They walk down a long highway. Thousand of people stand by looking at Liddy. Liddy looks at their faces and doesn't recognize any of them even though they were his employees, stock holders, and consumers of his products. He had never bothered to meet any of them.

The police officer led Liddy into a large court room. It wasn't the supreme court. It was something grander and more mysterious.

There were three judges, the three great philosopher kings that still reigned Thomas Hobbes, John Locke and Jean Jacques Rousseau sitting together staring down at Edward M. Liddy.

Thomas Hobbes gave his holding: Edward M. Liddy through your actions you have allowed the state of nature to enter into society. You have behaved in a way that allowed chaos and confusion. You have broken the social contract.

John Locke gave his holding: Edward M. Liddy you have taken my theory of labor and ownership and stretched it to the point of absurdity. You have mocked me. You have gone from corporation to corporation completely apathetic to what product they even produced. You care nothing for what you own. One owns through mixing one's labor. One does not own for the sake of owning. You have turned my theory into art for art sake, ownership for ownership sake. Where is the virtue in that? My theory was that people could choose their professions, that people could find freedom and joy in life through choosing what was best for them. Picking out a function in society and applying their personal freedom to it, mixing their labor, improving the world through freedom. You have not become rich and powerful using your freedom, but using other's people freedom against themselves.

Jean Jacques Rousseau gave his holding: You decided that you were a king of men. But men grow weary of kings that steal from them. You as a guardian led them to believe you were on their side, you had their best interests at heart. But you never did. You were convinced they were such stupid weak little things. They were so ignorant. They were so childish in their desires. But they weren't. You in your hubris led them to ask themselves, 'Am I stupid, am I ignorant, am I actually in chains.' Because what do chains imply Edward M. Liddy? Chains implies they know they are capable of being free. They weren't born stupid, they were born in chains. They were put in chains by guardians like yourself who didn't view them as ends, but as a means to increase your stock price. But through your actions their chains have disappeared and they are no longer ignorant of your vice. For the chains only exist if you and people like you are capable of getting them to believe you deserve what you have and they deserve less than what you have. But you have broken the social contract and they have lost faith and the Socratic questioning has begun again.

The court decided that Edward M. Liddy was guilty of breaking the social contract.

Thursday, March 19, 2009

Scheherazade

In a class at school there is a tall pretty Arab girl by the name of Scheherazade.

I look at her all the time and pretend I have a crush on her.

I don't because I've never heard her talk.

Today we were in the hall alone, within speaking distance of each other walking to class.

I said, "Scheherazade."

She said, "Yeah."

"Like A 1000 and One Nights."

She smiled and said, "Yeah."

Then we entered class.

I knew what I said was stupid

but I couldn't think of anything else to say

But I also think there's a part of me that wanted to torture someone because so many people have tortured me when they say "Noah the ark," or, "Oh, it's raining, Noah where's your ark."

Wednesday, March 18, 2009

Americorps is made bigger

Obama made Americorps bigger and better

Obama is doing a lot of shit

He has already made my pell grant bigger

stemcell research

set a date for the troops to come home

he's doing shit

shit is getting done

I read this Roosevelt quote yesterday, it went something like, "I'm doing things as fast the people will let me."

Tuesday, March 17, 2009

guinea pig suicide

Bernice's 13 year old niece said to me, "Have you ever seen an animal commit suicide."

I replied, "No."

"Well, Meeko my guinea pig was really old. And he died from being old and stuff. And Lizzy who had been living with Meeko her whole life got really depressed when Meeko died. So like, Lizzy stopped eating. And I kept trying to get Lizzy to eat. But Lizzy wouldn't eat. Then Lizzy starved to death and committed suicide."

"Are you serious," I said.

"Yeah, for real. It happened."

Monday, March 16, 2009

Endless fighting and bad behavior

So this week in humanity AIG gives 165 million dollar bonuses with tax payer money.

That is really bad behavior.

Then there the political fighting

Newt Gingrich who represents moderate republicans is fighting with Rush Limbaugh who represents wacko republicans

AND

John Stewart who represents far left liberals is fighting with Jim Cramer who represents moderate democrats

Now we need to be more specific about Cramer and moderate democrats

My parents and my dad's brothers and sisters, my friends' families are basically made up of moderate democrats

people who are pro-abortion, like social security, like welfare, like pell grants, like college loans, like evolution, etc.

The simple things of the democratic party

The same things Cramer is for

And one that is really important

People like my parents view

the three words

Harvard
Lawyer
Television show host

as the apex of the American Heaven

that if there is no god

heaven is

Harvard
Lawyer
Television show host

Which is Jim Cramer

Jim Cramer has excelled to American Heaven

People like my parents would be very proud if their son grew up to be

Jim Cramer

So when Jim Cramer is shit on by the far left

it is like

if you went up to some old catholic woman praying on her knees in a church

tapped her on the head and said

"You will go to heaven, but there will be a better heaven. And in the better heaven there will be people, who are better than you, looking down at you."

I'm not saying Jim Cramer is not a shitty person

I'm saying that is how a lot of moderate democrats took it

Then there is Newt Gingrich

A moderate republican

there are a lot of them

People with some money who don't want to pay taxes, don't care about abortion, don't care about welfare, don't care about anything but taxes really

They don't want Limbaugh running around saying crazy shit

All they want is to pay less taxes

This is really bad behavior

I'm reading about The Great Depression

and during that time the government got somewhat unified

They didn't fight each other like this

There is in fighting and fighting against each other

This isn't even an upper division history class

this is like an Intro to history class

where the professor says, "When governments become divided they fall easily."

In terms of political science

this is about the worst fucking situation you can have

The only thing left is starvation

perhaps if the grocery stores remain full and the food cards are reloaded with money every month maybe things will resolve themselves overtime

but i don't fucking know

I've never lived through a historical situation before

I've never lived, we never lived together through something that might end up in a history book

this is different

Sunday, March 15, 2009

4,000,000

So I'm reading about the Great Depression and The New Deal,

They this problem

In 1917 the Fordson Tractor was introduced and mass produced.

Farmers had never seen tractors before.

They were still plowing with mules.

Which meant they could barely plow any land.

Just what the mule could do.

Well, by the mid twenties everyone had these tractors and were growing massive amounts of food.

And this led to food becoming really cheap.

So cheap they couldn't afford to pay their mortgages or make any money.

The farmers thinking that if they could just grow more food, grew more food, and made food even cheaper.

This led to some bad shit.

So Roosevelt created this thing called Agricultural Adjustment Act or AAA, which bought the food or destroyed it.

But at the same time, the large farms were still producing enough food for all over America.

and there 4,000,000 people running tenant and small farms.

And Roosevelt didn't say it or do anything to harm them directly.

But he wouldn't help them.

The AAA basically implied, "Hey, there's no use for you anymore."

And those 4,000,000 million had to go somewhere and found something to do.

It would be like if someone went to the city of Los Angeles and said over a loud speaker, "YOU ARE NO LONGER NEEDED, PLEASE GO SOMEWHERE ELSE AND FIND SOMETHING TO DO."

Ides of March

I was standing at the deli counter and a man ordering ham said to the girl slicing meat, "I still haven't gotten over Friday 13th."

She replied, "Well, its the Ides of March."

The guy said, "That must be why my back hurts this morning."

Then another deli came up and said, "What's the Ides of March?"

The girl slicing meat said, "It's the day they assassinated Julius Caesar."

The girl said, "Ohhh."

Saturday, March 14, 2009

More on Cramer v. Stewart

Here are the two videos again.

Here's the Cramer v. Stewart interview

Here's another interview with Cramer to be balanced

Miles Clark has a really good comment in the previous post, everyone should read it.

To comment on comment: If this leads to total societal collapse and Americans start revolting. Dimon, Cramer, and Greenspan would for sure be killed. But if society doesn't collapse and everything continues on with only 25 percent of the population in food stamp misery. Then we will accept their apology.

*

I want to comment on the three philosophies dominating America, which can be seen clearly in those two videos sited.

You have Joe Scarborough who is a crazy Nozickian . Nozick's philosophy is that ownership reigns. That there are winners and losers and who the fuck cares. Libertarians or fans of Nozick like Scarborough or O'Reilly don't believe in Pell Grants, or welfare, minimum wage, I don't even think they believe in Social Security.

They believe basically that there should be no government. Police, military, and schools should all be privatized, and if you can't afford it, then you don't get it.

Of course you would still have to pay a privatized police force and hire mercenaries, which would be a form of taxes anyway. But that doesn't seem important to Nozickians.

A fan of Nozick is any person that says, "Well, they're lazy. I don't care if they have it."

An Ayn Rand fan that says they would never save someone from drowning because they might drown also is a Nozick fan.

If they know who Nozick is or not.

Now, we know from reality, that if there were no pell grants then half of the nursing and school teach force in America wouldn't even be there and wouldn't be there to take care of all these Nozick fans. But the Nozick fan isn't concerned with that. They have an agenda to make themselves feel better.

Then you have John Stewart who is Rawlsion. Now, dont' fuck around and read this. This is what Barack Obama is and what I assume most liberals are if they know it or not.

John Stewart like Rawls wants society to share its wealth. That property is not absolute, it is more like we are in charge of it. That if we live in a society and have agreed to live in a society, that we all owe a debt to it. And that no one can get so high that they do not benefit the least well off.

This basically means that if you are really rich, you are using society. And if you are using society you should give some of your wealth to bring the lowest up, even if it is a little.

That means welfare, pell grants, student loans, vocational schools, free public education, health care, etc.

Now there is the third group, which Cornel West talks about in Democracy Matters: these are the nihilists.

I would say Cramer and those other three television commentators sitting around in the second interview are nihilists.

They have no beliefs.

They are so fucking atheistic they make Sartre and Nietzsche look like 13th Century Franciscans.

They don't want anything out of life or from the earth but attention, money, and expensive shit to show their friends.

They are full of proud to the point of madness.

They have no idea or what the fuck is going on and don't even care.

But have gotten jobs that require knowing what the fuck is going on.

I should probably write a definition for nihilism so they don't go to the wikipedia page and become confused

Nihilism is a human being so consumed with ambition, being successful, having money, that they do not give a fuck whatsoever what they have to do to get that success and money.

Nozick, Rawls, and Nihilism are all godless though.

Nozick makes gods of men

Nozick tries to make some men gods over other men

Rawls on the other hand tries to create a sense of justice that we make exist through human effort.

Rawls says we can all cherish each other and make a godlike justice we can live by without god.

While nihilists say we should all be ignorant and apathetic for the sake of owning a really nice kitchen.

I mean we identify Cramer, Stewart and Scarborough and those are the people we shit on because they are the leaders in the conversations.

But those other three commentators were there, saying insanely dumb shit, saying whatever to get be on television and get paid.

What was amazing about the interviews and the last couple of weeks, with Limbaugh, Cramer, Stewart, Jindal, and all this crazy yelling

is that we are having a philosophical problems in America

On the far right you have Nozick and some strange version of Elmer Gantry Christianity obsessed with ownership if they were allowed to take their philosophy to an extreme would create fascism and completely disrupt society.

On the far left you have Rawls and a small extreme group of vegan environmentalists that if they were allowed to make their complete philosophy a reality would also create some kind of totalitarian hell and would completely disrupt society.

Then there is that 85 percent in the middle who are nihilistic and just float around taking orders from the crazy people.

I know there are a lot of vegans who read this, and I'm not talking about every vegan. I'm talking about the ones I meet who are obsessed not only with not eating meat, but that we need to take guns away from people, we need to make everyone stop eating meat, we need take candy, cigarettes, and mcdonalds and all substances that cause any health problems away. And close all strip joints.

And to say it, I've heard a lot of leftists say they wish they could stop hicks from voting because they keep fucking up things.

I heard one leftist say they didn't believe the 4th amendment should matter when it came to animals.

I also heard, "Stupid people shouldn't be allowed to have babies."

Which scares me.

Friday, March 13, 2009

Cramer v. Stewart

Here's the Cramer v. Stewart interview

Here's another interview with Cramer to be balanced

This is all really amazing to me.

I started watching the CNBC Money channel several times a week since last summer when the gas prices started to rise. They seemed like the only place that had any actual information of what was going on. And then when banks started to fail I kept watching for the same reason, they were the only place giving an information. They show the speeches that the other news channels get, but after someone talks several people with masters in economics come on and talk, while on CNN three very attractive people with communication degrees have some campy nonsensical debate of what was said.

I watch the channel because it doesn't have stupid shit on it about dramatic crap like missing children and other random crazy shit, and it doesn't turn news into a soap opera.

I mean, I don't want children to go missing, but they make it into something really stupid.

Also the women on CNBC are all really smart and normal looking, as opposed to other news stations where the women are picked because they are really attractive and are dumb as fuck.

So I've watched Jim Cramer a lot since last summer.

I watched a video of that Bear Sterns call like five months ago, I've read about his behind closed doors deals before.

Jim Cramer could easily be considered evil.

The total antithesis of Pessoa, of Jimmy Stewart

He is typical of what America has been producing for the last 40 years

A human taught that by playing by the rules, by kissing ass, by doing the right things, playing the game, getting up early, a person can make it in America.

Well, he played the game.

He went to Harvard and was Magna Cum Laude.

He was so into politics he studied Lenin and probably Marx.

Then he became a lawyer.

Then he opened his own hedgefund company.

This is what our schools tell us to do

This is what our media tells us to do

It preaches to us to constantly play the game, to be ambitious

To want money

To be successful

To want

Cramer is greater than Cramer, he is a symbol

When Stewart attacks Cramer he attacks a symbol

A symbol that America has become obsessed with this certain kind of success.

What amazes me more about the Stewart v. Cramer interview

is that Cramer never got self-righteous.

Dimon of JP Morgan Chase came on the other day and stated with anger that they were working 24/7 to save the Republic from insolvency and to not hate them.

Cramer could have said, "I was there, I was trying to help people. This is all because of me and people like me making. It isn't my fault you haven't made any money."

He could have like Dimon or Joe Scarbough.

And Cramer is such a loud bombastic character, I've seen him so many times yelling and screaming and acting nuts.

But he doesn't in front of Stewart

He sits there calmly.

And just takes it.

Do I think this is Cramer's and all those stock guys faults?

I don't.

That's how we get raised in this country.

Some of us figure it out, that worshiping mammon will not lead to personal happiness.

But most don't.

Most people are totally convinced that the word 'expensive' can save them from suffering. That 'impression' is more important than 'feeling.'

They teach us this in school.

I see it everyday at college

I hear it constantly from their mouths.

I said to two different people on different occasions, one of them was a professor.

When I graduate I'm looking to make 25,000 maybe 30,000 a year.

They looked at me like I was nuts and asked why I didn't want more.

There is a lot of peer pressure greed in America.

I think what I saw on Cramer's face, was that something went wrong. He had played the game, he had done what was right, he had followed the rules. And it didn't turn out good.

Henry David Thoreau just came into my living room and sat on my floor with his legs crossed and said, "Jackasses."

I keep thinking I might float away

The other day I came out of the Plato class and was standing on the steps leading out of the building. A bird made one of those weird bird noises

it seemed for like a piece of time during the bird noise

i might drift away into nirvana

and be blown out

or extinguished like a flame

and all my desires would leave

and with the desires my body would be gone

but it didn't happen

and I was still standing there

I've been sleeping a lot lately

it is my new hobby to escape reality

I always wake though

and my dick reminds me that i still want sex, even though i don't want sex, my dick still does

then my stomach growls and tells me i want food, even though i have no interest in eating, i still want food

and tonight it was cold and my body told me i needed a heavy coat and shelter, i have no interest in wearing a heavy coat or shelter.

So i sat and read Li Po

Li Po said to me

Man dies, his white bones are dumb without a word

then he said

The mountains crumbled.

And then Hughes visits me

Madam and the Phone Bill

You say I O.K.ed
LONG DISTANCE?
O.K.ed it when?
My goodness, Central
That was then!

I'm mad and disgusted
With that Negro now.
I don't pay no REVERSED
CHARGES nohow.

You say, I will pay it--
Else you'll take out my phone?
You better let
My phone alone.

I didn't ask him
To telephone me.
Roscoe knows darn well
LONG DISTANCE
Ain't free.

If I ever catch him,
Lawd, have pity!
Calling me up
From Kansas City.

Just to say he loves me!
I knowed that was so.
Why didn't he tell me some'n
I don't know?

For instance, what can
Them other girls do
That Alberta K. Johnson
Can't do--and more, too?

What's that, Central?
You say you don't care
Nothing about my
Private affair?

Well, even less about your
PHONE BILL, does I care!

Un-humm-m! . . . Yes!
You say I gave my O.K.?
Well, that O.K. you may keep--

But I sure ain't gonna pay!

Wednesday, March 11, 2009

Went to the bar tonight

Bernice my roommate went to columbus with her boyfriend for what I don't know. I didn't even know there was anything columbus. I'm assuming there's like twenty mcdonaldses. (How does one make McDonaldss plural?)

So I knew I was going to be alone

which is okay during the day when the sun is out

but i don't like to just be alone and exist alone

so i wrote a myspace bulletin that stated,

I'm alone for two days.


My roommate has left to columbus.

i'm bored,

someone call me to get a drink

and i will entertain you

i'll dance

and do fun stuff


A girl emailed me that I have only met twice, both drunk.

She said she was starting at a bar as a bartender and I could sit and talk

So I went

I went alone of course

I walked in the bar and sat down

there was a lot of men in their twenties there getting drunk

a young black guy in the air force drank next to me

He kept talking about the movie The Watchmen, saying it was really deep

then he saluted me to better days

so I said, "We have a new president, I'm happy."

Then he said something about the congress giving themselves raises.

Then everyone started talking about religion and politics so i went and smoked

and when it was over

i went back in

then the cavs came back from being 15 points behind and everyone was happy and telling each other that life was great and lebron james is jesus.

Then some asshole kept saying, "The Celtics rule!"

Then the owner told him he was full of shit

Then the people talking about politics and religion left

Then a young woman who looked like Ani Difranco came in and sat down next to me and talked to the bartender that invited me to the bar

She was really nice, completely destroyed character. She had two kids and had been married. She told me a long story about how her husband spent all their money and didn't pay the bills and she didn't find out until the house was foreclosed.

She didn't know what he spent the money on and her ex-husband has never told her.

Then the girl who invited me talked to Ani Difranco about her kid, and they talked about kids.

Then a guy came in who was engaged to a girl I know, but that girl had sex with somebody in her car and they aren't engaged anymore.

The guy who was engaged to my friend looked really bad. He had a beard and is working at a protein bar factory 10 to 12 hours a day. He graduated from college and can't find a job in his field. So he works at a factory and lives in his aunt's basement.

The girl who invited me to the bar kept referring to me as 'my noah.' Which was weird since she had only met me twice. She kept smiling at me and at one point put her face very close to my face to say something. I could not figure out if she invited me there to date me or was just being friendly.

Everyone was really lonely.

It was nice to drink beer with other lonely people.

Tuesday, March 10, 2009

Cooks and Servers

A long time ago in the 11th Century in the city of Kaifeng in China during the Song Dynasty. The city grew to over a million and had paper money. And someone thought, 'What does this city need? How can I make something of myself in this world?' A Chinese man by the name of Chang Fung opened a little restaurant that served rice, onions, and chicken.

On the first day the the cooks were working away making orders. A cook put two plates of chicken and rice on the ancient wooden window. No server came to get it for five minutes. One cook told another cook, “I'm working my balls off in this hot kitchen and these fucking servers don't even come and get their food!”

The server came, got the food and came back a minute later and yelled at the cook, “The chicken isn't done.”

The cook finished cooking the chicken and gave it back to the server.

The server walked out and gave the food to the customer, then went up to another server and said, “Fucking cooks fucked up my order, now I won't get a good tip.”

And there, nearly a thousand years ago, in the first restaurant the war was started between cooks and servers that still persists to this day.

Monday, March 09, 2009

writing dilemma

I have 37,000 words.

I'm on page 114.

the writing is going good.

I don't write much at once

or everyday

but when i do

it flows nicely

the lead character has finally arrived in nyc and has a large Socratic dialogue with another character

but now the character has to meet his 'love interest'

i am not good with writing out flirting

i'm not a flirtatious person

so i don't know what really to write

i can write a conversation between a man and women as co-workers, mother child, women with women, people in a long term relationship

but flirting and giggling i'm no good at

and i'm really scared it will come out like Nick and Norah or Vicky Christina Barcelona

I don't want it to turn into a conversation about the sexes just because a man and woman are talking

i hate that shit

i'm very afraid of being misogynistic

like it going from having a deep intellectual conversation with a fifty year old white men then it goes to when the character meets a women it turns into giggles and nothingness

or it turns into a Socratic dialogue about the sexes

my main intention always with my intellectual pursuits has been to be to find what is universal about humans throughout history. To continue the search of The Enlightenment.

I don't think our relationships are universal

our serial monogamy

they are some product of a surplus of wealth and goods.

that serial monogamy is a temporary event in history

and not something that will be here forever

it isn't that I don't enjoy serial monogamy

it is that when i listen and analyze the dialogue of movies like Vicky Christina Barcelona or nick or norah I get the impression that the writer is trying to say the things being said are universal

when they aren't

they are very timely

another thing is, i don't read novels containing a lot of romance. I think I've read like Wuthering Heights and a Thomas Hardy book once.

I'm very afraid of writing out romance

I very much want this book to be somewhat popular.

I feel it is a challenge to myself to write something coherently.

With a plot and direction

I'm still doing weird Socratic dialogues throughout it, but they aren't as weird as before.

They are more emotional and not in depth enough to be considered nonfiction like ones from Treatise.

There is no shitting, strippers, and not much swearing in it

There are barely any sentegraphs, when there are they are placed in certain spots to create action

but all this also implies that i can't just write out a woman character like I'm too

it could be that the women i'm writing about are college educated and from the upper classes

which i have not written about before in a specific manner

like in Treatise, there is a girl from the upper classes, but it is a generalized symbol and not an actual human.

My Life by Chekhov had basically only symbols, like Russian books like to do.

But I want these characters to be more specific, i guess i want to write it in a modern way with the characters not being real people, but "this single human."

My female characters have been uneducated blue collar children with strong bodies, who swear, have leanings to violence, and feel defeated

these women in Best Behavior will not be physically strong, won't swear much, won't be violent, and will be successful in the things they do.

I'm going to take an oatmeal bath and figure this out

Friday, March 06, 2009

The Film Continues

Here is a blogpost by Pirooz on the film.

he said about the the actors, "They were all very professional, kind, and passionate about the material."

I have this image of my head of the actors actually saying, "Who wrote this, a cunt. Because it sounds like a cunt wrote this. A mentally ill cunt."

More on Great Depression and us

Clark is right, we never starved.

The Great Depression never led to Americans eating bugs like they did in the Russian famine at the same time.

Or when the Russians ate each other on the eastern front in World War 2.

America produced so much food that the price was so low, Roosevelt bought some and destroyed it to drive up the price.

America can produce a shitload of food.

America produces so much food we feed half the corn to cows, make ethanol with it, and even sell it to China. And we can't forgot our massive tobacco fields used only for cigarettes.

I showed the previous post to Charles Hugh Smith and he supplied several points:

1. That if they started a Works Program of some sort the unions would get involved and demand good wages.

2. Building wind turbines and hydro power stations requires technical work, that requires education unlike the manual labor jobs they had in the great depression.

He suggested that we have a welfare state and wouldn't do as many works programs as Roosevelt.

This is because a welfare state is cheaper than works programs.

It works like this:

You have a person with no job

the state gives them 700 dollars to live on and 200 dollars in food stamps

But if the state gives them a job

They have to pay probably over a 1000 a month depending on their skill level and job.

If the person is assigned to build or fix a bridge. The state has to buy concrete, steel, a crane, a bulldozer, orange cones, uniforms, etc.

It comes out cheaper to just feed a person and let them sit in shitty government housing than have them work.

Smith made another point, that when the depression started the u.s. government had little debt, while America currently has the hugest national debt in the history of civilization.

We'll have 75 percent employment but there is a lot of food to go around.

Note: Don't mark my words as people say.
This is just bored speculation

I'm not really concerned that much

I don't have any power and can't affect anything.

I'm like getting raped like everyone else

bee

i was sitting this morning outside of C's Waffles.

I was smoking a cigarette and saw a bee buzzing by.

I said, "Bee, you're fucked, there won't be any flowers for at least a month."

The bee looked at me and said, "You think I don't know that asshole."

The Last Great Depression and its Effects on Government

Everyone is saying this is going to be a new Great Depression.

That there are less asserts than loan money that needs to be paid.

Which is fucking bad.

Which means the loans in the world are cost more to pay off, than what is in the world.

So the world has defaulted.

The world can't produce more than 87 million barrels of oil a day. They just can't do it. They used to be able to go up a little every year, but they can't now.

So we have a real life depression.

Hopes and dreams are lost.

Well, during The Great Depression

this is what happened

Spain, Italy, and Germany became fascist.

Russia had a huge famine.

America enacted The New Deal.

In England the Queen ate scone and told everyone to fuck themselves.

France some sort of New Deal.

Japan attacked China killing millions.

This was all within four years of the start of it.

Then 10 years later Germany and Japan decide to take over the world

and 55 million people die

This is not a good sign.

So if this Depression continues its course

in four years or 1913 we should see massive fucked upness

In ten years after last October or 1918, we should see really fucked up shit.

I don't think we will have a world war though.

Some people are predicting that

but the ability to kill million came from oil based machines used in world war 2.

If we don't have that much oil, then us humans won't be able to bomb and kill each other on such a large scale.

Which is good.

Of course that means there will still have to be a huge contraction in America because the economy will have to align itself with how much oil there is.

But I prefer starvation to being blown up.

I can't see how they could stop this depression. It seems like it was inevitable.

My prediction is that America will keep purchasing bankrupt institutions.

Those institutions deemed necessary like banks, car companies, construction companies, semi-truck companies, huge farms, etc

will be purchased using the Commerce and Takings Clause as they go bankrupt.

Some will say that purchasing those things will cause a higher national debt.

But that won't matter.

Because my prediction is that, the government will eventually start cancelling loans in about three years and actually be able to take property either cheaply or for nothing.

The governments and banks of the world will eventually come together and say that a lot of national debt owed by countries will be cancelled anyway.

America will become more regional and start producing products that are necessary in America, which will cause China to riot and become a chaotic clusterfuck and paying them back won't matter anyway.

China is fucked, they are just as stupid as us. Depending upon for so much of their capital was nonsensical.

Obama will eventually reestablish some sort of new Civil Works Administration that employ unemployed cheap labor employees to build windmills, hydro electric power stations, and other things that will help redesign the economy.

A lot of Peak Oil people say that we need to rebuilt our infrastructure to be able to work in a non oil world

well, the only way to do that is to create a Reserve Army of Labor, or an army of the unemployed that will work for cheap.

For America to redesign its economy around a world with less oil and natural gas it requires a work force that will work for next to nothing

Our government understands that

This depression is integral to the survival of the nation.

It needs to deflate how much money people get paid

from the rich to the poor

So when it time to put in a million windmills and rebuild a city so that it is sustainable and walkable, there will be millions of people there ready to work for cheap to do it.

A lot of Americans have forgotten, that life is predominately about work and suffering.

Tuesday, March 03, 2009

Shit talk about Roosevelt

I keep hearing shit talk about Roosevelt from assholes

lets talk about life previous to the great depression, the roaring twenties

the roaring twenties had several causes

world war 1 killed 50 thousand young men

and The Spanish Influenza killed millions of young people

if you look anywhere in history, after a huge plague there is an economic boom

And the invention of the tractor created a boom in food production which created a rise in population

but it wasn't that roaring

black people still lived in shit

the whites in the south were living in shit tenant farming

rural people all over didn't have electricity

there were no real interstates

capitalism is completely unregulated

there was no minimum wage

there was no social security

when you got too old to work, the world told you to die

So the depression hits after the dust bowl

Roosevelt takes over a failed system of shit

puts some of the people back to work

gives social security

gives a minimum wage

gives us an infrastructure

and what people do not recognize is that similar situations took place all over the world and they either led to fascism or violent revolution, both making for countries without democracy and without habeas corpus

So today I'm watching Anderson Cooper, who is supposed to be a nice person. Anderson Cooper is talking about the first project of the stimulus package which is an unsafe bridge in Missouri. The bridge is in horrible shape and falling apart, and it will create or maintain 240 jobs to build a new bridge. The citizens of that area are happy.

What does Anderson Cooper do and our media. They scour the area for one Republican economist from a local university to spout shit about FDR being a fuckhead.

Maybe I'm bias, i mean, because my grandpa worked for the Triple Cs and sent money back to his family instead of starving to death, and bernice's grandfather worked for the Triple Cs instead of starving to death, I've enjoyed highways and electricity, instead dirt roads and candles, millions of people get energy and water from the hoover dam, fuck that, that's stupid,

the fact the media even bothers to speak to republicans anymore disgusts me

speak to a green person, an independent, a socialist, anybody but a fucking republican.

i feel like vomiting

my bowels tighten in pain suffocating my shit turning it into diarrhea.

Monday, March 02, 2009

Jindal, The Ultimate Asshole



I just read something on yahoo and found out he is a Rhodes Scholar who went to Oxford.

This is so disgusting.

He talks like he on the The Andy Griffith show telling some dumbfuck story in some dumbfuck tone.

He is a Rhodes Scholar with Master of Letters from Oxford, he isn't a fucking retard.

I mean imagine the scene

The Republican leaders call Bobby Jindal on the phone, "I want you to go on after Obama gets off and act like a half drunk hick and tell a story that doesn't make any sense in a Jed Clampett voice."

Bobby Jindal responds, "I went to Oxford and once had a job advising fortune 500 companies."

"Bobby come on, the polls say we need ethnicity."

"I just wanna make sure rich people get tax cuts. I didn't think it would involve acting like a drunk hick telling racist jokes in a biker bar."

"Well, if you want that tax cut, that's what its gonna take."

"I went to Oxford and I'm Indian, those dumbass swamp hicks never went near me."

"Listen you went to Oxford?"

"Yeah."

"Well, you should be smart enough to act like a hick."

Then Bobby Jindal got off the phone and watched youtube videos of drunk hicks.

The Dow is at 6763.29

Everyday things get worse

The depression thickens

life sucks more

should i give up a dream of becoming a writer

probably

should i keep writing

yeah

I think everyone on these blogs should keep writing

it is important at least for the sake of posterity

Socrates in The Apology said that he went to the poets but the poets even though they had written wonderful things did not know what they were saying

Perhaps we don't know what we are saying

but I think if we write honestly

We can give a picture of what people were thinking and doing that led to the most awesome empire in human history taking a shit on the international stage

the job of the writer is to record the minutia. The writer has other jobs. But when a sociologist, philosopher, political scientist reads literature, they look at it for the minutia of the characters.

Those small behaviors that aren't recorded by legal contracts, laws, and statistics.

Literature teaches us about compassion also.

I don't think this is discussed in english classes, they teach about how to write concisely and with force.

But stories teach us morals and compassion

which The Labeling Theory doesn't.

It tells us something, describes

but it doesn't show, it doesn't teach.