Today millions of Americans will go to restaurants with their bitching mothers, waiting to be seated for several hours while their mother bitches. Then they will sit at a table finally after three hours and the server will be running around in a mad rush never getting them a refill. The cooks will be in the back sweating pissed off they haven't got a cigarette break yet. The dishwashers will be stoned and bitching. I believe mother's day is about suffering. I think it is because carrying a meaty bowling ball around for nine months and then giving birth to it requires suffering and fortitude, so everyone must suffer today for the sake of their sweet life, no matter how it turned out.
To cheer everyone up here's a song:
This song reminds me of my mother
And not to sound pro-life, here's a song to most of my female friends